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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24536056">The Man Before Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AstericLightning/pseuds/AstericLightning'>AstericLightning</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Trial and Error of a Jedi and a Spy [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Confessions, Fluff, Jealous Theron Shan, Jealousy, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:27:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,608</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24536056</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AstericLightning/pseuds/AstericLightning</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Theron confronts his boyfriend, RJ, about the picture of a man RJ knew back at the academy.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Male Jedi Knight | Hero of Tython/Theron Shan, Male Outlander/Theron Shan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Trial and Error of a Jedi and a Spy [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1773304</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Man Before Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I do not own any of the Star Wars: the Old Republic characters. All official characters and stories that were in the game are owned by EA and BioWare. Star Wars is also owned by Disney and Lucasfilms. Ryo, is an OC that takes the role of the Hero as the Hero of Tython in this fanfic series. Please support the official release.</p><p>Hi! I've been getting into the Old Republic recently through quarantine and I loved my male Jedi Knight interactions with Theron Shan. I want to make a series covering the trials and error, that these 2 will face through one off fanfics. The Jedi Knight's name in this series is Ryo Jali, or RJ for short.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Commander, can I speak with you for a moment?" <br/>
<br/>
RJ turned around and saw Theron Shan, his boyfriend for, quite some time now. They had been dating a few weeks after they reconnected back at the Alliance base.</p><p>RJ was no different from when Theron last saw him, then again, Carbonite was effective in keeping people trapped.</p><p>Theron himself, may have kept the same, rugged clothes back on Yavin 4, but he was more tired and brooding ever since news roamed around that the Hero Of Tython was presumed dead.</p><p>Theron was, rather disappointed and saddened over the lost of the man he adored. The leader of the Red Hutts, Hero of Tython who was able to defeat not just his ancestor Revan, but the Emperor himself.</p><p>Those weeks of planning and getting to know him, led to them sleeping together in the forest that night through all the sexual tension they had endured until their mission was complete.</p><p>He knew it was selfish to grieve when others were hurting more. His crew was struck with grief, even Scourge frowned at the sight of losing the fellow Jedi Knight, at least from what he learned from T7-01, it wasn't the same without RJ.</p><p>Kira Canvers, Doctor Archiban Froderick Kimble, and Scourge were RJ's closest allies and friends, that were still missing for years. T7-01 joined the Alliance early on and RJ had recently recruited Sergeant Rusk, so there were still 3 of RJ's old crew that are yet to make a return. </p><p>This wasn't about them now, this was about something else, something personal between him and RJ. For the time that they had dated, even if it's short, felt one-sided.</p><p>He's not saying that his significant other isn't putting out, because he <em>does, </em>in so many ways. Theron felt in the shadow when it came to RJ's personal life.</p><p>RJ knew of Theron's <em>whole </em>life. His ancestors, who his parents were, the switch of a potential padawan to a Republic SIS. Hell even his miserable love life, if you could even call it that.</p><p>"Depends, is it personally business or.. rather something, <em>personally</em>, personal." RJ stood up from his chair and mocked Theron's usual stance, as he tilts his body to the wall and crosses his arms together, amusing the irritation that was on his boyfriend's face.</p><p>"You suck at flirting," Theron had to pause for a moment, sweat drenched on his forehead. He sighed before leaning against the wall, looking at anything but RJ right now.</p><p>"I may have, snooped into your ship and uh, found a picture?" Theron mumbles the last few words.</p><p>"<em>Excuse me?</em>  Say that again one more time." RJ spoke loudly, he had never seemed this, mad or commanding before.</p><p>While it was making him both guilty, and horny, he sighed before making eye contact with RJ.<br/>
<br/>
"I spied on your ship and investigated your room without permission, I swear it was not meant to hurt  or betray you, I lo-" Theron paused and shook his head. It was too soon to say those words.<br/>
<br/>
"I wanted to know more about you so we can get along without having a conversation about me, and I wanted to know more about you."</p><p>Theron closes his eyes and takes a deep breathe. He was expecting RJ to be disappointed, and thought that he had just lost the man he cared about right then and there. But RJ, seems more interested rather then pissed.</p><p>That was probably the only benefit in dating a Jedi that stood for the Republic.</p><p>They won't kill you if you fuck up.</p><p>His stance changed to his hands in his pocket while leaning against the back of the nearest wall. Theron took out a photo from his pocket and quietly whispered, enough for RJ to hear what he has to say.</p><p>"Am I allowed to ask for this man’s name?”</p><p>"His name was Pam." RJ spoke softly, did he already know who Theron was talking about?</p><p>RJ took the picture from Theron’s hand and sat down on a chair. The man was a human, brown hair and light skin with a scar that pierced across his cheek.</p><p>Theron could feel the fact that he fucked up now, who was this man, was he an ally or rival of RJ? Maybe it's his brother or cousin, RJ is usually quiet about his emotions when it comes to other people.</p><p>He spoke more like a leader, even with Theron sometimes, why was this different now? Why is he so special compared to him or Lana or even his old crew?</p><p>" I'm sorry, is this a sensitive topic?"</p><p>"He was my boyfriend, Theron."</p><p>"Oh."</p><p>
  <em>Oh? </em>
</p><p>Theron Shan, formerly apart of the Republic SIS and was one of the <em>top</em> agents there. And yet the only word he can muster up to presumably the most known hero in the galaxy, his <em>boyfriend, </em>was,  'Oh?"</p><p>He’s sleeping on the couch tonight. If he hasn’t fucked up his relationship yet.</p><p>There's an awkward silence between the two of them. RJ kept looking at the photo and Theron kept, dwindling his fingers, biting his lip as he looked at dark skinned, dirty blonde hero. Looking around for the nearest sight of entertainment to ignore the awkwardness.<br/>
<br/>
"If you, uhm." Theron finally starts speaking, as he looks up and locks eyes with RJ. His heartbeat rose and blood started rising up to his cheeks.</p><p>He knows for sure, with no doubt in mind that he is in love with RJ, Roan Jalek. For 5 years he can never see eyes in another woman, or man.</p><p>It was always him, it would be him that Theron loved. But if this man, Pam, made him really happy, who's to say that he wouldn't treat RJ better then Theron can.<br/>
<br/>
"Let's both be professional about this, with your old flame, and I've been a jerk and a bad boyfriend." Theron starts to choke up his words.</p><p>This was, not the emotion Theron ever dealt with. It was always just a blank state that got him this far, but after just a few weeks of dating RJ, his insecurities rose up once more.</p><p>Would it be okay for the Jedi Order that RJ would be with him? Can he treat RJ like a good boyfriend because that was what he deserved?</p><p>Those two questions popped up on his head and the longer they were together, he always felt like there were better out there, maybe Pam is what he deserve-</p><p>RJ stands up and grabs Theron's hands, and hold them firmly, making Theron rather surprised at RJ's boldness.</p><p>"Pam's been gone, for years now, we had an affair and had to keep things secret back at the Academy." RJ smiled, and intertwines their fingers together. "He would do these stupid things like sing or show me songs from across the galaxy.” </p><p>RJ smiled as he takes another step towards Theron's direction, they're merely inches apart from each other now. Theron's used to being the one to take action, so this is new.</p><p>"He died when the Academy was attacked by some undercover Sith. " RJ paused and looked up, he locks eyes with Theron once more. </p><p>"I thought I would never have feelings for anyone again, that being a Jedi meant the people over me first. You changed that. I developed feelings for you."</p><p>RJ, sighed as he looked down on the floor between them, stunned about what he has to say.</p><p>"5 years felt like a month ago, and I had this, <em>these</em> feelings for you, and I was scared that maybe you woke up one morning," RJ pauses to take a deep breathe, he never learned to express his emotions, only to repress it during his training, and even more when his old lover died.</p><p>"It's okay, Ryo, I'm here." Theron whispered as he moved his hands from RJ's hands to his back to bring him closer.</p><p>"I was, scared. that if you woke up one morning, and you would realize that, 'I don't care about him anymore.'  An you’d move on with your life.” RJ paused as he started shaking. “I was mortified that I wouldn't be enough when we got together.”</p><p>He looked up and saw Theron, genuinely blushing before putting his right hand on the side of RJ's cheek, closing his eyes and leans in for their lips to meet.</p><p>This felt different from the past kisses. This was, sentimental, and possibly, could it have been real love? Rj pulled back for air and looked at Theron in the eyes.</p><p>"I'm sorry." Both shouted at the same time, looking at each other with a flabbergasted expression respectfully.</p><p>Theron smiled and RJ chuckled while looking down. " We're not the best at this are we, Theron."</p><p>"It's not the first problem we've faced, and it wouldn't be the last." Theron grinned, surprising RJ by picking him up and walking around base, anywhere, just to talk.</p><p>" How about we go to a Coruscant Cantina, just the two of us, I get to know more about your life and you can see I'm more then just a two-dimensional person."</p><p>"Theron Shan did you just ask me out on a date?" RJ says in an amused tone, Theron doesn't seem bothered though.</p><p>"Well you are my boyfriend, and I can ask Lana about about the next time we can take a day off or if someone can fill in for us."</p><p>"I feel bad with whoever has to deal some of your shitty contacts." RJ rolls his eyes as he wraps his arms around Theron's neck.</p><p>"I'll take that as a yes then."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey thanks for reading! Sorry if there are any errors, it is currently 3 a.m, stay safe everyone during these times!</p><p>Also, after each one off fanfic I’m putting a song you can listen to, to reflect on this story and the feelings Theron and/or RJ will face in these chapters, this fanfic’s song is</p><p>Celine Dion It’s All Coming Back to me Now</p></blockquote></div></div>
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